I turn 25 on Thursday EL 10 DE DICIEMBRE. *insert osteosporosic bone crack*

One benefit I am looking forward to is being able to use my senior citizen's discount for a mean discount on new Blackberry.

The Blackberry's trackball, by design, is filled with the failtastic power of 21 dropped and abandonded Bad Boy Records artists and the scorn of 32 jilted, niggerdick-hungry Tiger Woods jumpoffs.

It's a colossal fail.

To date, I have been through two trackballs on this phone alone. Since I believe the leather slipcases that are offered with this phone are gayer than pink footies, my phone is subjected to dust and debris in my pockets daily. So, limited scrolling ability has become the norm now that this Blackberry is on its last leg. As of last night, I can't scroll down.


I shall scoop a new one Friday, one day into my middle agedom. I shall also have a camera and videophooooone (*snap to Beysus*) capabilities...which means

YOU GET LIVE FUCKERY ALL.DEIGH.ERRY.DEIGH.

Go ahead, do the electric slide in celebration. I know you're as happy as I am.

On a serious note, all praise due to Saint Damita Jo for surviving these past few trying months. May she protect me with the same strength God used to keep LaToya Jackson from succeeding in life.

amen.